Irvine Marriage Counseling
                            Irvine Couples Counseling
                            Irvine Family Therapy















Marriage Counseling or Couples Counseling can be utilized to assist
you with improving the quality of your relationship. Inotherwords, to
help you be happier, feel closer, and re-energize both of you to help
your relationship grow. The best marriages and relationships have
difficulties from time to time. Those difficulties usually involve one or
more of five crucial of a relationship discussed below.
With the proper assistance, you can learn how to keep those five
aspects working well. The divorce rate in America is 45% after the first
marriage, 65% after the second, and 73.5% after three marriages. The
earlier you get help, the less likely you will be
part of these statistics.

Our only models for how to be in a relationship are our  
parents, and our experiences. Can we beat the odds, and have
a better relationship. Absolutely, but it takes a willingness to    
work towards that goal, and Marriage Counseling with you and your
partner can make that happen.

In order for a relationship to be successful, five parts of a  
relationship need to be working:

1)Communication 2) Honesty 3)Trust
4) Balance of Power, and 5) Intimacy.

Communication: We all communicate with each other.    
However, when issues arise in a relationship, we tend to  
communicate less effectively. By learning ways to
communicate better, you have the needed tools "to keep
each other talking" at those times when it's really important
to do so.

Honesty:  Honesty means being genuine, and
telling the truth. Each individual deserves privacy when
they choose. However, when the issue affects both
people in the relationship, being genuine and
telling the truth can prevent issues that can place the
relationship at risk.

Trust: When a relationship is sustained by trust,
it has a sturdy foundation. Trust is very difficult when
one or both partners have a history of abandonment  or betrayal.
Therefore, betrayal of trust can, and often is, the "deal breaker" in a
relationship. If you have trust issues from the past, and are currently
in a relationship, counseling can assist you with
those issues before they negatively impact your relationship.

Balance of Power/ Control:
Each couple's balance of power and control may
differ. In a relationship, each individual may want
a certain amount of power and control. Each member
of the of the couple handles certain tasks for the mutual
benefit of the couple. That balance can be 60/40 for
some couples, and others prefer a 50/50 split. If this
balance changes before the change is agreed to by both   
partners, problems can develop.               


Intimacy: What is real intimacy? Yes, your sexual relationship with
your partner is part of intimacy but intimacy is much more. Being
together as a couple or family in a quality way is a part of intimacy.
Talking with each other, activities with each other, and doing activities
together leads to stronger intimacy. When
intimacy issues arise, one or both partners have not
communicated openly, and as a result, the other begins
to feel alone.

Learning and utilizing a few relationship tools can
protect your relationship now and in the future.  
If you find that some problems come up several times
with no resolution, remember that Marriage Counseling     
or Family Therapy can be utilized as a preventative step
to stop the problems early, so that your relationship can    
be healthy once again.

What is a healthy relationship?

A healthy relationship is built on two foundations, and both need to be
strong. One is self-awareness because that helps you understand
what each of you contribute to the relationship.The other foundation is
based on love, which is so much more than what we feel and say to
our partner. Harville Hendricks, a teacher
in Marriage Counseling,offers this definition:           

Love is " a behavior, where
the safety and welfare of the
other is guaranteed."

At Irvine Marriage Counseling or
Irvine Family Therapy, you will
be able to:

Be together in a new way
Improve Communication
Respect each other's needs
Break down those“walls”
and Love … as a behavior.

Family Therapy

The needed ingredients for healthy relationships within
the family utilize each of the various aspects above. In my
work with families, I look at the family as a whole, and how
each relationship is working. By looking at the whole, I can
quickly see where relationships need to work in a more  
effective way. Then, by improving those relationships, the
family as a whole will learn how to function better.

I'm sure your significant relationship and your
family are most important to you. I invite you
to consider what has not worked in your
relationship or family, and decide instead,
to put your time and energy into what will.                      
                                 

Irvine Counseling and Hypnosis Center                        Marriage Counseling Irvine
Call 714-418-7454 or Email